I’ve only been manually updating the Apache configuration (/etc/apache2/httpd.conf and /etc/apache2/extra/httpd-userdir.conf) since I got my most recent Mac (purchased with Catalina). Apple’s updates don’t destroy my configuration, but the Relocated Items folder that gets created contains the factory-default contents of these files, which I compare against mine in case anything new got added that I might want/need to integrate.
On my prior Mac, I was running Apple’s Server.app, which had a nice GUI for Apache configuration, which I used at that time to configure and manage it.